BEDA: Failure, and Failure Unrelenting

4 Apr

Glory of glories. After a mere day of Blogging In April, I have already failed the challenge by not fulfilling the Every part. I see this as irrefutable proof that I am a hopeless gibbering moron, and if you disagree, you are… well, wrong.
I was out with friends last night and came back too late to write a post for the 3rd. A technicality, you might say, since all you really need is to make thirty posts for each day in April. Not so, I fear: the exact letter of the law bids me to Blog Every Day April, and in this I have failed. I find it uniquely depressing that I can’t even finish my fun internet side-projects, let alone anything useful and constructive.

Nothing is left now but to find a small hole in the wet Northumbrian countryside, cover myself with a tarpaulin soiled specially for the occasion, and live out the rest of my days in ignominy and shame, and blog no more forever.

Wait, though.

What if the project has no strict laws? What if it’s merely an exercise, as Maureen Johnson has hinted, in which you are forced to write a blog every day in April to get used to writing regularly? What if you simply write two blogs in a day if you miss the previous day’s? Is it too bizarre to consider the possibility that I might not be executed by the BEDA Police for my terrible crime, that they might show mercy and allow me to live?

Is it possible that I can find the strength to cast off my shame and rise, phoenix-like, to claim ultimate victory?

Find out in five minutes!


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